Homebuyers, I know you’re scared. You’re scared that the home of your dreams is going to slip through your fingers. You’re scared that the estate agent is trying to rip you off. You’re scared that you’re always going to be living with your folks in a quiet court in Boronia. And being scared makes us all into d*cks. But in the second of Hometruths Melbourne’s Don’t Be a D*ck Guides to Real Estate (read the first instalment here), we highlight ways you’re unconsciously being a tool during your journey for property – and how this toolery is actually preventing you from achieving the holy grail of property ownership.

1. No-one owes you a property, so stop acting as if they do.

Property prices in highly desirable areas with limited property supply – typified by their proximity to the city, to amenities and to employment –  are not going to become more affordable. The reality of our economy is that Baby Boomers are moving closer to the city. Baby Boomers are asset rich, thanks to both their time in the market AND the era they were born into. Their good fortune (and decision to invest in property) is broadly a trick of fate, and not a personal insult. As opined on in our Negative Hearing blog, some home buyers foster unrealistic ideas about the economy they exist in, and what they should be able to buy. They refuse to look the difficult reality of our economy squarely in the eye and adjust their expectations.

Australia’s capital cities are quickly mirroring their European counterparts, with the soon-to-be norm being lifelong tenancies rather than home ownership. Melbourne is growing by 1760 people per week, consistently. They’re all competing for a limited amount of affordable property. Interest rates are at all-time lows. Sitting on your hands and waiting for a ‘bubble’ to burst before purchasing is ultimately self-harming, pricing you out of your preferred inner-urban location. Property in the inner-city is expensive. I know it is. It’s galling to see a two-bedroom shitbox in Brunswick go for a cool million. It can make you feel helpless and uncared for by the community in which you live. So mourn it, gnash your teeth and rage to your peers.

And then make sure you get over it and make a decision to do the best with what you have, where you can.

2. Shit properties are the shit.

Just like everyone should have that one shit boyfriend/girlfriend to teach them the value of a quality relationship – everyone should have one shit property in their purchasing history. It builds character. And more importantly, it gives you the opportunity to spend time in the market watching your asset grow.

Are you turning your nose up at old school one bedrooms on the edge of growth suburbs, because they’re too far from your ideal, or because they’re a bit manky? Think carefully – these outer fringe growth corridors are ripe with the relatively-kinda-affordable properties that you need to buy to hop on the asset elevator. If you are on a strapped budget, avoid brand new off-the-plan apartments. They might appear convenient and glossy, but they come at a substantial premium for size and have stamp duty plus a margin built into their prices. Choose the ugly duckling, which will grow in value at a rate you can’t possibly hope to save yourself. If you’re lucky enough to be able to do so, buy an ugly property now, and in a decade you’ll be glad you did – congratulating your former self whilst quaffing single blend coffee in your renovated residence. Or continue dissing properties that don’t have all the bells and whistles while waiting for prices to come down. Whatever.

3. There’s no conspiracy to screw you over.

Estate agents are hard workin’ schmucks in shiny suits with leased European cars. (I say this with love – I’m married to one.) They’re not Bilderberg Group evil geniuses. They’re not making voodoo dolls of potential buyers and working out the most audacious lies to tell them. Bottom line: if you have enough money you’ll buy the property. If you don’t, you won’t. There’s nothing else to the story, not really.

What agents are doing is working very hard to help their vendor come to terms with the reality of the market they’re selling within. This is called conditioning. There’s nothing evil about this either – it’s just a process which helping sellers look more dispassionately at their asset so they can make a decision to sell when an appropriate offer presents itself. It involves the feedback of recent sales results, and comments direct from buyers too. And whilst you bitch to your mates that property sales results are offensively high (‘That guy paid waaaay too much for the property. What a rip off!’), the likelihood is that the vendor probably wanted 10 – 20% more for their property than it eventually transacted for. It’s only through the hard graft of education that the estate agent has eventually brought buyer and vendor together.

Remember that the estate agent works for and is paid by the vendor – not the buyer. This doesn’t mean that agents work against you or are hating on you. More often than not, buyers are working against the agent by not showing their true interest in a property, before becoming angry when it’s sold ‘under their noses’. As if, by showing their interest and enthusiasm for a property, something terrible will happen. If you’re finding your hand staid by agent paranoia or lack of knowledge of the property market and its machinations, I suggest you engage the services of a buyer’s advocate to help you acquire a property. Buyer advocates work for and are paid by their buying clients – and they can be just the ticket to help you get over your toolery in the kindest possible way.

4. Hand over your frickin’ details.

Enough with the playing hard-to-get with phone numbers and email addresses at open for inspections. If you don’t hand over your contact details to the agent or you make a song-and-dance about the process you are a tool. You’re disrespecting the owners of the property AND the property professional standing the open. It’s someone’s home and a space that needs to be secured – it’s not a free-for-all for nosey parkers. And whilst I am all for nosey-parkering, nothing is for free: your details are the passcard to the inspection. If you’re buying  or selling property (or even if you’re not – at least, you’re not now) – these details will allow the agent to invite you to similar upcoming opens, and to build a hopefully mutually useful relationship. Sure, their weekly emails are often boring and won’t regularly be tailored to your exact needs. It is what it is. It’s a social contract. Don’t be an open for inspection tool. (And don’t badmouth the property whilst you’re there loudly, either. There’s a special place in hell for those people.)

The ‘Don’t Be a D*ck’ Guide to Real Estate’ by Hometruths Melbourne comes from a good place. When I say ‘don’t be a d*ck’, I mean it with goodwill to mankind (and agent-kind) in my heart. Let’s be real: property transactions can bring out the tool in everyone.

A property transaction is one freaky concoction of anxiety-inducing factors: think jealousy, greed, mistrust and boredom – shaken, not stirred. We all participate in the real estate market to a greater or lesser degree, and we can all improve our behaviour whilst negotiating within it. Today, Hometruths Melbourne presents ‘Don’t Be a D*ck: The Estate Agent Guide‘, which focuses on common ways – often unconscious – that you, the estate agent, can come across as a real d*ck to the wider community. Read this guide and be downright legend instead.

1. You’re an agent. Not a gangsta, bro.

A wise Principal of mine had a pet hate: sunglasses on agents. Even worse – sunglasses on the HEADS of agents whilst at open for inspections. At the time I though he was being pedantic, but in reality his disdain at sunnies-on-Saturday was right on the money. They inferred a casualness that was at odds with the role of the serious, knowledgeable property professional.

You’re an estate agent: you need to dress the part. You need to present yourself in a way that makes people connect with you and trust you. The path of least resistance is the one to tread. Don’t wear tightly fitted fashion suits that can barely contain your pecs (do you even lift?), and don’t spray yourself so liberally in fragrance that the tenant next door can smell your Lynx Africa.

Are you a lady agent? Awesome. Word from the wise: don’t wear heels that make you totter like a dolly. This makes you appear vulnerable, weak, and far from businesslike. Wear heels if you like by all means, but be able to walk well in them, to look robust. Avoid clothing that’s been sprayed-on, and be careful with your spraytan and makeup, too. Aim to be bullet-proof in your physical appearance – don’t allow chinks in your professional armour put you at a disadvantage.

Lastly, make good choices with your vehicle – which is an extension of yourself. Clients will see you pulling up curbside, so try to make sure your car is clean, and that you’re not pumping out sweet tubthumping junglist cuts so deep the tarmac is vibrating. Avoid incredibly showy vehicles. Don’t alienate your customers – show them that you’re a lover of fine things, sure – but don’t be an ostentatious bogan. In short, don’t be a d*ck.

2. Be transparent.

As anyone who works within the industry knows, real estate is an arcane business. Down is up, right is wrong, what looks natural is confected. This is part of the reason why the public are so mistrusting of estate agents. They don’t understand the business, because in order to do so they’d need to step outside their own motivation: the buyer would have to put themselves in the vendor’s shoes, the vendor in the buyer’s. And whilst occasionally we might get clients who are eminently reasonable, most need a good does of firm but fair conditioning to be ready to make a decision about their future.

They need structure, they need rules, they need transparency above all. This makes the average punter – who only transacts property once in a blue moon – feel more fairly dealt with. Here are some ways to achieve greater transparency in your real estate practice:

• Have a documented offers process for transactions. Be able to send your policies to clients who need to know more about making offers prior to auction, multiple offer scenarios, boardroom auctions etc. Your whole team needs to be on board with this.
• Provide comparable sales. Regardless of your business’ philosophy on quoting, comparable sales are a great way to win the confidence of purchasers, and they should give a true indication of current market conditions.
• Be firm and earnest in your responses. Sometimes we cringe to speak plainly with clients – whether they’re vendors, buyers, tenants or landlords – tell them the facts as they are. They might blow up in the first instance, but your working relationship will be stronger in the long run.

3. Don’t be the office leech.

Are you the person who’s always selling properties out from beneath the listing agent? Are you focused on working buyers rather than bringing new business on? I’ve got some bad news for you. You’re a leech. If you do this just occasionally, or you’re learning to be an agent and getting a few sales under your belt, you’re OK.  But if you’re being the creep who can’t list and exists by selling properties out from under listing agents, I’ve gotta say you’re a d*ck. Harden up with a long, cool glass of concrete-flavoured prospecting. #RealTalk

4. Don’t prospect like a d*ck.

‘Hi this is Jayden from XYZ Real Estate. Are you thinking of selling your property?’ ‘Hi is that Mrs Pana, erm, Popol, erm, Panapopoulos? It’s Cherie from ABC Property. Can I sell your house?’

If you’re making prospecting calls like this, stop. If you have a Principal who believes these calls are productive, find an agency to work for that believes in developing actual human relationships. As any agent knows, selling (and to a lesser degree, leasing) a person’s property is an intimate role. You earn the right to ask that question by offering service and showing competence and market presence. Asking a stranger flat-out if you can sell their property is a d*ck move for two reasons:

• The likelihood of listing a property without a prior vendor relationship is next to nix. You’re more likely to offend them with your impertinence than anything else, spoiling your chances of beginning a useful conversation about their property.
• If you were to be invited to list this property, you’d likely be in a ‘chicken raffle’ listing scenario with an array of other agents. As they vendor has no relationship with anyone they’re interviewing, they’re probably motivated by fee alone. Are you the pants-dropping agent who wants to work at an offensively low commission? No, you’re not.

Instead, focus on clever ways that build value around your identity as an agent. Think service first. Call people on the street when you list a property, and ask them if they’re interested in expanding their portfolio. This is an effortless question which infers the subjects’ competence and largesse. Call them to tell them what the property sold for. Call them when someone else lists in the same street, or sells in the same street. If you have a good conversation with someone, send them a thankyou card. And no, not some cheap corporate jobby. Go to the newsagent and make an effort. You will be remembered for your unusual attention to detail. Create a private social media group to invite communities to based on suburb. Become an authority. Make your vendors and buyers rave with unexpected, creative gifting – it doesn’t need to be expensive, but it does need to be thoughtful.

Are you a buyer, landlord or tenant? Stay tuned for your very own ‘Don’t Be a D*ck’ Guide to Real Estate’ by Hometruths Melbourne. Subscribe to receive our next blog post.

Want to learn more about the author of this article? Visit the Ruby Slipper website. 

I had my popcorn. I had my Milo. I’d taken up most of the couch. My anticipation level was high: a Four Corners Home Truths special was about to explode all over my television screen. This was my Eurovision.

As a property commentator and real estate industry writer, I was looking forward to incisive debate and genuine reflection on Australia’s housing affordability issues, including negative gearing and its possible reframing. I live for this stuff. But rather than a discussion about factors which put upwards pressure on the housing market (read: ultra-low interest rates, booming populations in capital cities, an ageing population of asset-rich baby boomers downsizing and overly generous negative gearing benefits), Four Corners focussed on uninformed anecdotes on the difficulty of entering the property market – presented without criticism.

It is undoubtedly difficult for first home owners to get a foothold in the property market. But it is not impossible. If you have employment (winning!) and the ability to scrape a deposit together (the serious difficulty of which is one of the core reasons first home buyers can’t get a loan), you will be able to purchase something. Four Corners presented the story of a buyer – Jules McKendry – a 25 year old who has managed to save an incredible $150,000 deposit. That is substantially more than most first home buyers – or second home buyers – have to their name. Jules has bid at over 20 auctions without success. She and her partner are looking in Kilsyth, Melbourne – which is about 40 kms from the city. Interviewer Ben Knight asks Jules if she subscribes to the ‘great Australian dream’. She responds ‘Yeah. That’s exactly right. You know, it is a three-bedroom, one-bathroom…’. And why is it that Jules posits she can’t buy a property? The investor.

BEN KNIGHT: Right. So you’re thinking that this is who you’re up against. You’re up against the investor…

JULES McKENDRY: A hundred per cent.

BEN KNIGHT: …who just wants to subdivide.

JULES McKENDRY: Yeah, exactly right.

BEN KNIGHT: And so ha- have you lost out on auctions to investors before?

JULES McKENDRY: Oh, 100 per cent. Yes.

This is complete supposition. Four Corners did not question Jules’ ‘100%’ certainty of having being beaten to property by investors. How does she know who has she been beaten by? Have they disclosed the motivation for their purchase? Does Jules think they are investors because they look like people from another country, or because they are older?  The bottom line is, Jules doesn’t know who her competition is. And they’re not the reason she hasn’t acquired a property.

When it comes to buying a property, Jules is her own worst enemy. The reason she hasn’t purchased a home are her own ideas about what she can afford, and what she needs. A 25-year-old may want a three-bedroom home on a quarter-acre block, but the reality is that it’s unlikely she needs one as her first home. After losing at auction 20 times, most buyers who are committed to purchasing a home would have learned something from their experience. They would have adjusted their expectations to match their budget, instead of competing for property that they cannot afford whilst the market around them continues to rise. Jules is indulging in a form of financial self-harm which I observed multiple times during my years as an estate agent. A particular client I recall waited year on year for the market to crash in order to buy her dream apartment. The market still hasn’t crashed – in any meaningful sense – and 15 years later, she still hasn’t purchased a property – just like Jules.

It isn’t the investors that’s stopping Jules from getting on with property ownership. It’s Jules. Jules is obviously hardworking and fortunate – she has done the hard yards in saving an amazing deposit. She has opportunity at her fingertips, but stubbornly rejects it because it doesn’t match her ideal of the great Australian dream. Both Jules and (second first home owner test-case family) the Robsons hope for a property market crash. But what do they think this crash might look like? And are they betting on catastrophe at the risk of being locked out of home ownership altogether?

Amy Reynolds from APT Capital Management posits a crash is on its way, saying: “According to pretty much any housing market indicator you want to look at, house prices in Australia are significantly overvalued. And we see it as having deviated from normal values and long-term averages by about 40 per cent. So we’re expecting this kind of fall to take place in the housing market.” But when, Amy? And why?

I am sorely disappointed that Four Corners didn’t look to major factors that differentiate our property markets from those of Europe and America. Four Corners also didn’t clarify that massive growth in the value of property is far from universal – it’s only growing in leaps and bounds in premium areas close to the city. As our population swells – Melbourne growing by an average of 1760 people per week – housing will remain in hot demand. As we enter a new stage in our national growth and development, areas close to cities which offer employment will become increasingly blue-chip and tightly held. They won’t be crashing any time soon, because there will always be a limited amount of property available in these premium locations. Investors and buyers are far more at risk of having their asset’s value ‘crash’ when purchasing new-builds in outer-suburban locations where there is low capital growth, and a surplus of land. There is limited resale value in these new communities, because of their isolation and a premium being placed on the build rather than the land value. The value of properties in outer-suburban areas could be improved by a government commitment to enhancing the amenities of those communities – think public transport, schools and hospitals and incentivising small and medium businesses to set up shop in these areas. Families could be assisted to stay living closer to the city with better planning regulations, which define a healthy mix of one, two and three bedroom apartments in any development. Importantly, we need to think creatively about re-engineering negative gearing.

These were the issues I had my popcorn at the ready for when I heard about the Home Truths special. I was looking for a meaty discussion on amending negative gearing in an inventive, fair way. At incentives we might offer first home owners to help them overcome the tyranny of that 10% deposit. And an even-handed unpacking of uninformed suppositions by buyers like Jules – who aren’t buying for a lack of means – but because of unrealistic expectations about their first property.

The only thing I’m expecting to crash in the near future are my expectations about Four Corner’s property reportage. (PS I’m a pinko-lefty from way back. You’ll always have a special place in my heart, Four Corners.)

Let’s be real: no-one gets into real estate to be a team-player.

To be a real estate agent – at its most rarefied level, to be a masterful negotiator – is to be an individualist. One who can withstand endless cruelties from the public, hang-up phonecalls and relentless rejection. And that’s not a bad thing. After all, if you were a born ‘team player’, you probably would have been more attracted to a fixed-income job in an industry that didn’t reward individual efforts. This isn’t to say that estate agents are lascivious, money-loving loons in the model of Bob Jelly – far from it. Estate agents (and for the purposes of this article, we’re talking about sales agents here and not property managers who are necessarily far more team-oriented) have a tough gig that makes their profession a vocation. They’ve more in common with the funeral industry and its client pastoral care than they have with their suit-wearing compatriots on the stockmarket floor – estate agents are helping stressed, worried, disoriented and often disarmingly greedy people to make life-changing decisions which are finite. That’s no walk in the park, no matter how much you’re paid.

To be a sales agent is a job that you do by yourself – you’re attending people’s family homes late into the evening and early in the day, exposing yourself to their emotional wackyness, irrationality, fear and (eventual) gratitude. Before you even get a foot in the door, you’ve usually prospected those same clients for years on end with relevant market information – and this doesn’t guarantee they’ll use your services, either. And you do all this alone. You might enjoy your colleague’s company and support at open for inspections – you may even list together from time-to-time – but when all is said and done, that commission check and subsequent retainer balance is your responsibility. So let’s lose the empty rhetoric about being part of a team, shall we?

Depending on the way that your commission structure works, you’ll receive a portion for listing a property, for managing it and for selling it. Some agencies pride themselves on their team’s ‘group selling’ mentality – engaging in weekly ‘caravans’ which not only burn petrol and hours of good prospecting time, but allow agents to see (and potentially sell) the properties their colleagues have listed.

I call bullshit on both caravans and selling other people’s listings. Both these practices are cancer to a corporate culture, let alone one that purports to prioritize ‘teamwork’.

Agents who are unable to list should not be rewarded for cannibalizing their colleague’s hard-won listings. It might take years to get a quality property on the market with a motivated vendor: claiming a willing buyer as ‘your own’ and then grabbing a 20% share of your colleague’s hard-won listing isn’t exactly what you’d describe as a friendly, team-y act, is it? Newbie agents should instead be grown into a culture of client relationship development by attending listings with their Principal or other leading agent, seeing the process of fostering trust and negotiating from the ground up. Too often, new sales agents are still being left out in the cold – either being forced into the full ‘list and sell’ too swiftly, or being encouraged to survive by working buyers, selling the stock of agents who are able to list. Such top-down negligence can only breed contempt within a real estate business.

Little wonder, then, that corporate real estate awards nights, Christmas parties and training sessions are accompanied by a strong undercurrent of petty jealousy and aggression. By pretending that teamwork matters when real estate is actually about business written, the real estate industry attempts to obscure its true nature from its very workforce. No-one’s fooled by this charade of mateship, least of all the agents that work within it. This is not to say that colleagues can’t learn from one-another, support one another or build a culture of respect. But respect – by its very nature – means not stealing from one another’s plates to survive.

There’s no ‘team’ in real estate, surely as the Emperor isn’t wearing any clothes. Agents are working for themselves and their clients – and the sooner they embrace this raw savannah truth, the stronger they’ll be for it.